Not So Happy Day

So like I said in my last post, I was going to focus on the fact that I have an amazing mother in my life who I admire and adore. That was pretty easy to do until it was time for church. I wasn't looking forward to church, but I was excited about getting to skip out on the Mother's Day service today because I was helping with children's worship rather than staying in "big church". I was going to dodge the traditional handing out of the roses to all the mothers that's always done at the end of the service. Big sigh of relief! Except this year they changed the format. This year they had the kids pass out the roses to their mothers. So in order to have them hand out the roses they had to be in the service. Yep, this was done BEFORE we left for children's worship which meant I got to sit and watch all the women around me as their precious child handed them their well deserved rose. I felt as though I had been stuck with one of the thorns from the rose. To my surprise I handled it pretty well, actually. Mostly I stared at the floor, but a couple of times I looked up in the choir only to see my dear husband J staring back at me with the most pitied look I had ever seen. I just couldn't take it, so I immediately stared back down at the floor. But wait...it gets better!

So I was just about to the point where I could say, "Thank God that's over!" when a deacon walks up to my friend and me and asks, "Have you ladies gotten your rose yet?" All I could think was, "Holy crap he did not just ask me that!" Thankfully that's not what came out of my mouth. I politely smiled and choked out, "I'm not a mother." My friend has a precious little boy, and her husband came down from the choir loft and handed her her rose since Blaine was in the nursery. So of course her answer was, "Yes, thank you." Again, I turned my eyes to the floor.

And somehow after that I was supposed to take everyone else's children to children's worship and teach them about serving others. Wow, how ironic. On Mother's Day I got to work with the children of our church. Oddly enough, that's where I felt I belonged.

So to all the mothers of angels who didn't get their rose at church because of miscarriage or infant loss...Happy Mother's Day. We ARE mothers, and we deserve a rose.